First things first, I have a Hentai Foundry. It has pictures I wouldn't post here (because an art website doesn't like it when there is sex in the art. You know, one of the most pervasive issues of humanity that needs to be explored and discussed in art. Because think of the children. NO DON'T THINK OF THEM LIKE THAT!!!) So please, take a gander. Just search "Ozu-Kenji" on google for Hentai Foundry and you will find it.

Also I am officially not going to do anymore Warhammer art. I am sick to death with it and I need to focus on some of my other projects. Projects that will not get me sued over copyright infringement. If you only watch me for Warhammer, now is the chance to leave.

Not that is out of the way, we can get to the real meat of things.

When I joined deviantART all those years ago, I was a pretty hardcore Christian. Was. But slowly and surely my faith has been weathered and worn down to a sheen.

Is there a God? Isn't there? To me the answer is simple: I don't know. Nobody knows! How can they? Because of the Bible? Because some guy said he had a vision and said there was?  Because science? Because some of you want to feel some sense of superiority over your dad when he beats you up when drinking? NO ONE KNOWS! Isn't that wonderful? Once you have accepted that fact that you don't know, the world opens up to you like a canvas to paint and write your own story without the useless obligations to being faithful and true to your God or to prove that you are religiously nonreligious.

Granted, I do believe that while not every person  subscribes to a 'religion', every human ever subscribes to 'religious behaviour'. Everyone. If they say they don't, then they lying or unaware of it. Every person engages in religious behaviour . Everyone has their life, moral values, decisions and the manner they conduct their everyday behaviour is based around rituals, faith and belief in that there is an unseen order to the universe. Even if that order is chaos. I do it, you do it, EVERYONE does it! It is not memetics or God revealing Himself that religion or belief exists. It is simply because we are acting in the manner that we have been designed to do so, by the cruel hand of chance or by some dark and terrible intelligence.

Everyone is faithful in something, and will act irrationally and violently to defend their faith. There are atheists who will defend their position with fire and fury. They will yell and gnash their teeth over how there is not a God. If you mentioned the very possibility that there might be, in some form, then they cry and insult. They will threaten you with violence. Not all of them are like this of course. But then, isn't that the truth of all religions? Aren't they all but communities based around a core concept and philosophy who just wish to conduct their lives in grace and dignity? But each one has fanatics. Even the non-religious.

However, to me, it is all a meaningless exercise, at least from my point of view. But I don't believe I am 'above it all', to prove it I am going to reveal what I believe happens to you when you die. It is entirely based around faith: hoping and believing despite the lack of data.

I believe when you die, you go exactly where you think you are going to go.

If there is a guy who says: "I am a bad person, so I am going straight to Hell with all my friends." Guess where he is going? He is going to Hell, and all his friends will be there. Hey, he might even enjoy it. Hell for him and his friends is probably just like Earth, except that denizens are red and have horns. In addition, it much hotter and the Thames is made of lava. But it still costs way too much for petrol.

If you are an atheist and believe you are going to stop existing that means you going to stop existing. If you are a Buddhist and you believe you are going to be reincarnated, then that means you are going to be doing this sad song and dance all over again. If you think you are going to Heaven, then guess what:  you are going to Heaven.

Why do I believe this?

Well, you know about parallel universes? Well, that basically means whenever there is a slight change, whether it a particle simple switching polarity or you decided to change the channel, then there are two universes born. The one where you keep watching Jersey Shore and the other one where you watched SpongeBob for half an hour. The cat is both dead and alive. The poor cat. That means that there are an infinite amount of universes, and an infinite amount of possibilities with each possibility in turn having an infinite amount of universes. Now, think, REALLY think what 'infinite' actually means.

That means that there is a universe whose physical laws and mathematics are such that the universe in question is 'designed' by infinite chance meeting infinite probability to serve as your afterlife. The physical laws of the universe are such that your current consciousness as it exists now is the one that will exist in that way because the science of that reality says so. Moreover, there are an infinite number of afterlives of just this one type.

It is because of this reasoning I believe absolutely and irrevocably that when I die I will go to Valhalla. With friends of course. Valhalla is no fun alone.

This is of course all theory. I could be HORRIBLY wrong, but you know what I would not be disappointed. After all:

I don't know.

Maybe I'll go to Hell for not being a good Christian. Suits me. Any God that is THAT demanding and specific about what I must do to get into Heaven yet doesn't constantly and consistently provide concrete evidence over it doesn't come across as the kind of God I would like to spend an eternity with. Maybe God doesn't care and just asks that I be a decent human being. No problem there, as I at least try to be decent even if I don't succeed. Any God THAT reasonable is worth spending an eternity with. It may not have the drunken sex, fighting and eating as Valhalla, but there are worse ways to spend an afterlife than chilling by some cosmic shore drinking Pina Coladas with Laid-back God. In that case, I imagine Hell is full of all those self-important dickfarts who simply did no good in life and now have to spend the rest of forever with their tedious problems and sad personalities. Sounds fair.

Buddhists say that if I am good, I will reach Nirvana. Whatever. If I am bad then I will be reborn as a banana slug. Now to be honest: That sounds alright by me. I have absolutely no problems with being a banana slug. I cannot think of a more relaxed and chilled life than that of a banana slug. I might be eaten though, which means I get to go to Nirvana. Because I was a good banana slug. This is where the whole Buddhist/Hindu cycle of reincarnation and well as karma thing just falls flat on its face for me. It doesn't really go anywhere, and it is just stinks of bullshit. But I have never put much stock in the teachings and philosophies of the East. Except maybe a small bit of Confucianism. Not all of it, just the good, sweet parts. Like how one should never get an erection while at an airport. That is dogma I can get behind! But Chi, Karma, Reincarnation, Chakras, Kami, Feng Shui… it's all good old fashioned bullshit to me!

What if there is no afterlife when I die? Well, then all my worrying isn't going to be worth squat if I don't exist. It is frightening idea that one, and it maybe why Heaven or even Hell is so much more preferable to people.

But regardless, just live. In the end this is the only life you got.

Because in the end: We don't know.

And isn't that a wonderful thing?

Ozu-Kenji